Resolutions That Really Work

“If you do not fail you will never succeed, and if you succeed, failure will become your friend” Ken D. Foster

How many of you have set resolutions every year, only to find yourself not following through several weeks later? That’s because we set out to accomplish new resolutions using old habits. That’s not going to work. So, are you ready to add another definition to the coined term: New Year’s Resolution? How about looking at your resolutions as a lifestyle change rather than an obligation? In other words, ask yourself this, “What bad habit or habits am I willing and courageously going to leave behind in 2009 and move forward without them in 2010?”

We are not only in a new year, my friends. We are also in a new decade. Doesn’t it sound more powerful and motivating to once and for all make those lifestyle changes?

 Are you being complacent? Are you just coasting in your life? Or, do you have the desire to be more and offer more to yourself and others? I would like to ask you something that will require a bit of introspection: “Have you shown up to your own concert?” In other words, are you living an authentic life and bringing forth your greatest talents and skills?  Look at it like this; thousands of people are in a concert arena. They have their outfits on, looking good, feeling good, and really ready to have some fun. Thousands of people are eager to hear and see your performance. But, YOU don’t show up! You are the star and thousands of people need to hear what you have to offer.   

There are many reasons why we do not show up to our own concerts. For starters, many of us wait for things to happen to us, or for others to do the work. This is your life and you are the actor on your own stage. This message today is to help you wake up so that you are not sleep-walking through your life anymore. Once and for all, you are going to live the life you desire with intention, structure and more importantly; belief in yourself.

Fear, self-doubt, self-sabotage, and low self-esteem are indicators of why you have not shown up to your own concert. What is really holding you back? Do you have a plan? More importantly, do you have a daily plan? Without a plan, our goals and ambitions can be unclear and being unclear can cause fear of the unknown. Fear can lead to procrastination, and as a result we spin our wheels and nothing gets done. Fear, however, can be both our best friend and our worst enemy.

Look at the word FEAR in a new way—as an adventure and doing something new. Doing something requires skill. Learning a new skill requires patience, mindfulness and positive self-talk. Do you find yourself telling yourself, “I can’t do this”. “I am too stupid to do this”, “What was I thinking of even trying this?” The way we speak to ourselves plays an enormous part in our success. It determines whether we continue to be motivated to reach for the stars or to stop dead in our tracks. When you try something new that you want to tell the world, be mindful as you take on your new life’s journey. Use some of these questions to guide you:

What three things/goals will get me closer to where you want to be?

How do I set my goals to be manageable and realistic?

What roadblocks can I anticipate?

How will I cope with those roadblocks?

What worked?

What did not?

What can I do differently next time to improve my results?

Trying something new not only requires positive self-talk, but also commitment.  Are you committed to starting each day with gratitude so you can show up to your own concert with clarity? The way you greet the world every morning sets the precedent for the entire day. Whatever occurs in your day is because you have set the intention to have it be such. Let me ask you this, “What is the first thing you think about when you wake up in the morning?” Really think about it. Did you immediately go to your To-Do List or did you give gratitude for the day beginning?

Here are some helpful tips to start your day:

Start your day by giving thanks. Feeling grateful helps us get out of our way and see life in a positive light. We greet the world by saying, “THANK YOU.”

Read something inspirational – when we do this, we become motivated to achieve the same success and attract what we want.

Sit in silence, breathe and meditate – when we master these skills we give ourselves permission to be open to what the world/universe/God is telling us. All answers to all problems come to us when we sit in silence. 

You are the most important person in your world. Remember that! It is not being selfish. It is having self-respect and self-love.

To find out more about Ken Foster and his programs go to www.premiercoaching.com or www.theentrepreneursedgecoaching.com and check out his latest bestselling book at www.asksucceed.com

Show Up To Your Own Concert Today!

Choices

“Poor questions and choices cause a man his own destruction” Ken D. Foster

I want you to picture yourself two years from now. Imagine that in those two years, you are required to make significant changes in your life. You have been given all the resources to make positive choices that will create positive outcomes. It is your last day of those two years and you will be given no more resources or opportunities to grow. You will remain stuck for all eternity. How does that feel? How does it feel to know that you wasted two years doing the same thing over and over again and gained no positive change? Sounds scary, doesn’t it?

 Well, this is reality for many people. One day you wake up and realize that your life has been filled and fueled by habits that inhibit your personal growth. You create your own life. You have created your own reality by the choices you have made.

 To start with making positive choices in your life, first make a choice to respond with kindness. Choose to take the road less traveled. Try not react in vengeance or payback to those who did you wrong.  When we are kind to those who wronged us, we feel empowered and experience self-love.

 There is a difference between a reaction and a response. A reaction is emotional and immature, whereas, a response is logical and mature. Once you can master that, your choice has empowered you. For example; every event evokes an emotion. Your emotion contributes to a response or a reaction. In a split second, your choice to respond or react can determine a positive or negative outcome. When you make the choice to react, you only damage yourself. You can become angry, stressed, anxious and worrisome; none of which are good for you. When you choose to react to an event or a situation, you lose your personal power. You have handed over power to your emotions. Once you can master your own emotions, the choices you will make in the future will be more responsive and logical. We create the outcome in everything we do and say.

 Choices can also disempower you and force you to remain stuck in old habits. Look back at something that happened in your life recently. Was there a decision that you made where you could have responded differently? What was that event? What choice did you make to diffuse the situation? Did you react? Did you respond? How does it feel looking back on that event? Could you have responded differently to it to have created a more positive outcome? You must learn to become detailed and specific about the choices you make or you will continue to repeat the same habits which in turn will have the same outcome.

Fear is a choice. Fear can be your best friend AND your worst enemy. Wouldn’t you rather embrace fear of the unknown than run away from it? I know this sounds cliché, but imagine 30 years from now and you are looking back on your life. Would there be something that you wish you had done, but chose not to because of fear? I am sure there is. We don’t move forward in life without taking some sort of positive risks. We also don’t get anywhere from worrying about the “what if’s”. The “what if’s” will hold you back from the success you want to see in yourself.

What choice can you make today to move yourself forward whether you are scared or not? The goal here is to get you unstuck from making poor, useless, and unproductive choices. Let’s make the change.

How do you do that? First, you have to be aware of the energy that surrounds the choice you are about to make. Take, for example, your breakfast. If you reach for oatmeal first thing in the morning, you know it has health benefits. It will give you more energy and lower your cholesterol, so we hear. Doesn’t that sound more beneficial than reaching for frosted flakes? How would you rather start your day? Healthy or Unhealthy?

Here is a choice menu for you to try:

Begin taking ownership of your life and the choices you made in the past: Accept and Surrender to it. It is what it is and you cannot change the past. The only thing you can do is change your future by making positive choices.

Every single morning make the choice to feel great. Before you step foot on the ground, tell yourself it is going to be a great day and you will feel and be awesome

Take pride in everything you do. Go into it with a positive attitude. Remember, you cannot change people or situations at times, but you can change your response to them

Here is your weekly introspection.

Ask yourself this question every morning:

WHAT ACTION STEP(S) CAN I TAKE TODAY THAT WILL DETERMINE POSITIVE AND SUCCESSFUL OUTCOMES?

To find out more about Ken Foster and his programs go to www.premiercoaching.com or www.theentrepreneursedgecoaching.com and check out his latest bestselling book at www.asksucceed.com

Gratitude

“Gratitude is the emotional life blood that gives us the ability to feel connected to the deepest part of ourselves and experience joy that is right before our eyes.”  Ken D. Foster

As you travel through this journey called life, there will be many events that will make you feel that there is virtually no hope. You may feel and become depressed, anxious, and worried about what will take place next. During these moments it is very easy to be blind to the beauty and love that surrounds you every day. Whether you live in a city or a rural area, there are good things happening all around you, when you take time to look.

So, how do we get out of our own way to see this beauty? Nothing positive or beautiful is seen in moments of chaos, stress, negativity or depression. In fact, that is all that will be seen. Everything in life takes effort. Lessons can be taught and skills can be learned. The power lies within you. You will have to try to see the good fortune that surrounds you. Now, you may be telling yourself that you have no money in the bank, my husband/wife left me, I lost my job, and now my Toyota is getting recalled. Yet, if you start asking the right questions, I can assure you that you will feel gratitude and see the goodness in everything that is coming your way.  

Are you one of those people who tend to focus on what you do not have and not what you do have? If so, have you noticed that chaos and negative outcomes seem to flow into your life continually? We all have our complaining and “the world is out to get me” moments.  It is OK to notice what is not working in the world.   But when we dwell on what is wrong and focus our energies on worrying, complaining or judging the world, nothing productive or good comes out of it.  We tend to get what we focus on, wouldn’t you agree?

Complaining and wallowing in negativity or self-pity will cause emotional upset and stop you from being productive. The question I would like you to ask yourself is: What do you get out of complaining? Do you feel strong putting down people, places or things?  Do you get a false sense of power?  When you can find out what the emotional payoff is, you can stop the behavior and replace it with a more productive question.  Like, “What is good about the situation?” or “What is perfect about what is happening?” or “What is the opportunity hidden in this seemingly negative situation?” These types of questions tend to focus your mind in the direction of wisdom, instead of what is wrong.  So, let me ask you this, “What are you willing to do today, to stop sabotaging yourself by complaining or focusing on the negative?” The choice is yours. Are you ready to see the good fortune that is in your life? If so, read on.

There are many good things to be grateful for, yet so many of us dismiss them or take them for granted. Sometimes we just don’t see what is really happening around us, because we are caught up in what we think is right.  But have you ever asked what you are not seeing that is right in your presence?  Take a look right now, and find something in your environment that you are grateful for.  When we see the good in life, including the good in the challenges that are coming our way, we start to realize that no matter what happens everything is there for a reason.  It is there to help strengthen us, and move us forward in life.   

If we want to make positive changes in how we see the world, and grow in abundance, then we must learn how to be still and master the skill of being present. What I mean by present is that the past is done and the future has not happened, yet. Therefore, to be grateful requires release of the negativity that occupies your thoughts and to give thanks for the now. If you can master the skill of being grateful, you will see significant life transformation occur. As a result, you will appreciate life and all it has to offer because you are now focusing your efforts on seeing the blessings that surround you rather than the sorrow that controlled you.

I am going to give you an assignment that will help you learn to see your blessings. Sit in a quiet place with a piece of paper, pen or pencil. Take a deep breath and look at your day. Ask yourself, “What ten things am I grateful for happening today?” Then commit to writing down ten things every day for the next seven days.  In just seven days time you can change your mind and open up new possibilities for you.  As you will find out, you actually do have a lot to be grateful for.

Here are some things that I have recently been grateful for. As you write your own, write them with conviction. Begin each gratitude with I AM.
1.  I AM grateful that I have bills to pay, because that means I am alive to see them.
2.  I AM grateful that I was sitting in rush hour traffic because that means I have a car to drive.
3.  I AM grateful that I can speak so that I can help others.
4.  I AM grateful that I have a job that I love because so many do not.
5.  I AM grateful that I have friends, family, and pets that love me unconditionally, because many do not.

I would like to leave you with this. 

Gratitude is a gift from God to help us see reality clearly and get us through the toughest of times.  It unlocks the fullness in life and increases the joy that all of us have inside.  It helps us turns pain into understanding, ignorance into wisdom, hate into love, chaos into order, confusion into clarity and failure to abundance.  It can turn your greatest challenges into your greatest learning experiences, and your biggest mistakes become your greatest miracles.  Gratitude increases your connection with the deepest part of yourself by helping you let go of the past, be in the moment, and by so doing, create a compelling future. 

So, today is the perfect day to be in gratitude and face every challenge with two powerful questions; “What is perfect about this situation?”, and “What am I grateful for?” 

 

To find out more about Ken Foster and his programs go to www.premiercoaching.com or www.theentrepreneursedgecoaching.com and check out his latest bestselling book at www.asksucceed.com

Your Calling

“There is no greater force in nature than the power of a soul committed to evolving upward” - Ken D. Foster

I have a friend who had a dream for 15 years. She wanted to be a public speaker and life coach to empower and educate people on domestic violence prevention.  She tried for several years to make that happen. As she traveled on her path through life, she found herself in dead end jobs, all the while desiring and focusing on what she wanted to be: a public speaker and life coach. She was always dissatisfied and discontent with all the positions she held in corporate America.

She was never happy with what she was doing, nor was she ever fulfilled. She was neglecting her passion.  Things were not working because people around her could not understand why she was still trying so hard to make her dream a reality. They continued to tell her, “Why don’t you just give up and stay in a job that pays you regularly? That way you don’t have to worry about money coming in.” That same person down the road told her, “Did you know that 80% of people despise their jobs?” She was adamant in her response, “I am not going to be one of those 80%.” 

As I was interviewing her for this blog article, she began to be really honest with herself. She told me that she used to just dream about her dream. She never had a plan or a blueprint on how to get to where she wanted to be, on a platform inspiring people. She continued to wait for things to happen. She did not know the work that it took to get her on that platform of life. She began to doubt herself and her abilities. So, she continued to stay in her dead end jobs and go back to school so she could counsel people. That way she will always have the security of a job. Although she did not enjoy it, life was easy.

Ten years after the traumatic death of a family member, she had an emotional breakdown that placed her in a behavioral health unit at a local hospital. After her three month treatment was completed, my friend found the speaking topic that would fulfill her calling: Mental Health and Wellness. She had some money saved up, so she made a commitment to herself that she will share her story of struggle and triumph so that others do not experience what she went through.

You see, we all have an experience in our life; each of us has a story that resides in us that is yearning to be revealed and shared. Once my friend had her personal experience, things began to happen for her. Her passion and focus shifted from a desire to a purpose; from a HAVE TO HAVE IT to a WANT TO SHARE IT!

Now, she wakes up every day with excitement and gratitude. She creates her day with completing three tasks that will get her one step closer to living her destiny.

Have you ever asked yourself probing questions that get to the root of your inner self? Have you done the inner questioning to help you uncover your purpose—what your life is calling you to do? We must ask ourselves powerful questions to get to the core of our being.

To get you started, have you ever asked yourself, “If time and money were not an issue, what would I be doing?” I like this question because it is as if we won the lottery. If you won a million bucks, what would you do? A question like this can begin to unveil some of your interests. You may discover you like to travel, remodel homes, or you are fond of antique cars. You may discover you like to paint or garden. You may discover you love working with kids or charity organizations. You may discover the talent that can turn into a skill you can share with others and be paid to do it!

So, ask yourself, that question and maybe some of these:

Am I honoring myself and the gifts, talents and skills I am blessed to have?   

If I had a choice of what would bring me substantial income, what would that be?

Does my choice reflect your highest values and beliefs? NOTE: Your values, beliefs and morals must be congruent with your passion and purpose for life.
 
Am I living a life of balance between work, play, family, recreation and spiritual commitments? If one of these is off kilter, then most likely your life is unbalanced.

Isn’t it time to discover what you love so that you can do what you love? Have you heard the saying, “Do what you love and love what you do?”

I want to scare you a bit here. Imagine you have one week left to change your life, to turn that dream of yours into a reality. Once your day 7 arrives, there is no going back. You will remain the same for all eternity. The chances of you ever wanting to pursue your dream are over. You will not have any more chances or opportunities. It is day 6 and you are still doing what you did before you were inspired by this blog. You are still sitting, hoping and waiting for change to just happen. Day 7 has arrived. No change has occurred because you never asked yourself probing questions that would change your life forever, turn your life into a purposeful one—a life that could inspire you and help others.

Start searching for meaningful work that you will enjoy and will truly fulfill you and feed your spirit. Find a career where you will not rely on an alarm clock because you are so excited to get up each morning and get started. I am not saying to quit your job tomorrow. You have to be smart when making significant life changes. Determine how much money and time you have to invest in yourself at this present time. If you have a house and no money in savings, I recommend keeping your job and do three action steps a day to get you one step closer to your dreams. Eventually, over time, you will get to where you were meant to be all along.

It is never too late to change.  I have met people who were well into their 50s who decided that today is the day their life will change forever. Today is the day they will no longer tolerate the ball and chains that held them down for so many years. Today is the day they will explore who they really are and unveil what they truly enjoy.

Do you have limited beliefs about your ability to change? Of course you do. It is scary. But, that is the purpose behind this message. I want you to imagine yourself in the place you want to be. Close your eyes and imagine. Start believing in yourself that you can live the life you desire and that you were meant to. You were meant to live a life of peace, abundance, satisfaction and fulfillment.

MINDFUL EXERCISE:

Every time a negative thought or limited belief enters your mind, anytime a response begins with a “Yeah, but” or “I wish I could, but can’t”, anytime one of those limited beliefs enters your mind, I want you to say to yourself, “STOP IT.” Just STOP IT and close your eyes and imagine yourself in the life you desire.

And ask yourself these questions:

  • When the time of my death comes, how will I want people to remember me?
  • What is the inspirational, moral, and wise legacy I want to pass on to coming generations?
  • What ways can I use my talents to serve humanity?
  • What is the work I feel I am meant to do?
  • What three tasks will I do to get me one step closer to my dreams?

Answer these and you will be well on your way to finding your calling.

To find out more about Ken Foster and his programs go to www.premiercoaching.com or www.theentrepreneursedgecoaching.com and check out his latest bestselling book at www.asksucceed.com

Finding Peace in a Stressful Life

“We are disturbed not by what happens to us, but by our thoughts about what happens.” Epictetus

Imagine you have decided there is no way out of your current life situation.  You will keep earning the amount of money that keeps you just over broke, you will continue to have the same relationships that don’t support your dreams, you will not be able to organize your life, your family life will not improve, the weight you have been trying to lose for years will keep coming back and your success will continue to start and stop over and over again. 

You know the stinking thinking that got you into this mess will keep you right where you are.  You have come to the conclusion that you will have to change your thinking on the inside in order to see life differently on the outside. 

The mind has one job - to find the truth to any question asked.  The problem that gets in the way of finding the answers to every challenge in life is twofold.  First, most people have been programmed to find the answers outside of themselves by asking teachers, family and friends for advice; and second, much energy is wasted on trying to prove the perception of what the mind perceives is true.  Your mind will try to overlook anything that will prove it wrong. 

Let’s take the latter challenge first.  If a thought crosses your mind that your partner doesn’t love you and you dwell on that thought, then the mind will start looking for proof.   It will try to prove that the statement is true and search for answers that justify the statement.  Then, your partner walks into the room.  Unbeknownst to you, she has just received some news about a friend who has lied to her.  You look at your partner’s face and think, “She can’t stand the sight of me.”  Now you have your proof.  Since thoughts beget feelings and feelings beget actions, you are now feeling angry, so you react to your partner by storming out of the room (action) to justify your thoughts that she does not love you.  Your mind uses this to enforce the original thought and so justifies its righteousness.  If at this point you call a friend and tell them how right you have been about your partner not loving you and your friend agrees, then you have more proof to justify your thoughts.  But this thought is an illusion.

If you use the mind properly and search for the real truth within yourself, you will soon come up with a truth that will replace whatever you have made up.  You can retrain the brain quickly by quieting the mind and asking powerful questions that will stir you to seek the truth.  You can find these powerful questions in the book “Ask and You Will Succeed.”  www.ask-succeed.com

An easy one to ask is, “Is this really true?”  If you keep asking the question you will eventually get to a new understanding of truth, in which case the mind will override and replace the original thought.  You will know when you have the right answer because you will have lasting peace around the issue. 

After answering the questions in “Ask and You Will Succeed,” many people experience immediate relief from thoughts that have troubled them for years.  What is noteworthy is that people who have redirected the mind continue to broaden and expand their life.  Many have had breakthroughs in the area of finance, where money is no longer a struggle.  Some find the career of their dreams.  Some experience more joy and fun in their lives than they have had in years.  Some who have been searching for life partners for years find them; others find their health improves dramatically; and many experience a newfound peace. 

What is exciting is that the inquiry can be fun.  The questions in “Ask and You will Succeed” are designed to work on both simple challenges and earth-shattering problems.  The questions are an education and they will bring light on every area of your life to put an end to ignorance and bring in joy.  The gift is that you will change the conversations in your life … and your life will never be the same again. 

The right questions will change perceptions and shift reality.  They will free your spirit from the prison of self-defeating thoughts.

Authentic Communication

When distinguishing the word authentic from similar words like sincere or genuine, Webster’s dictionary defines authentic as “…stresses complete sincerity, without feigning or hypocrisy.” So, authentic means being real.

Authentic Communication is the instruction we receive from our deep inner core. These are the instructions that reflect our deepest values, convictions, philosophies, dreams and beliefs — what is real and unique. These instructions must be distinguished from the cultural conditioning, also know as group think, which are the collective beliefs and systems given to us by others, e.g. parents, schools, relatives, and institutions. These programmed communication patterns are, for our purposes, archaic. These speaking patterns contain many shoulda, coulda, wouldas, and are guaranteed to constrict and suffocate the true self. This kills creativity and leads only to compliance and compromise.

An intimate relationship with ourselves is vital to the process of living and authentic life. Over the years I have coached thousands of people who have learned to tap into their inner wisdom and create the life of their dreams. The coaching experience allows one to quickly and intimately become connected with his or her own deep inner process. By connecting with your Authentic Self you will create and make better choices, increase vitality, and understand why you are here. This is what Coaching is all about, and what will lead to your Greatest Year Ever! For more information to http://www.premiercoaching.com .

Cause of Anger

“The greatest of all enemies of man is himself. More than personal or national enemies, more than germs, bombs or any other threat, man should fear himself when he is wrong. To remain in ignorance of your divine nature and to be overpowered by bad habits is to make an enemy of your own self. The best way to be successful in this adventure of life is to be your own friend.”
- Parmahansa Yogananda

What does anger have to do with success? A life filled with anger is one subject to violence and chaos, one in which peace and tranquility are strangers and resentment and blame constant companions. Anger is the cause of broken homes, broken dreams and broken lives. An angry life is an unsuccessful life.

When resentment born anger is left unchecked, it can harden into impenetrable barriers, emotional defenses that separate us from the ones about whom we care most. In a life lived from behind these bulwarks, finger-pointing and blame are so rampant that one is rendered incapable of taking responsibility for his actions. Love withers and dies.

“Many people are driven by resentment and anger,” says renowned pastor and author Rick Warren in his book The Purpose-Driven Life. “They hold onto hurts and never get over them. Instead of releasing their pain through forgiveness, they rehearse it over and over in their minds. Some resentment-driven people ‘clam up’ and internalize their anger, while others ‘blow up’ and explode it onto others. Both responses are unhealthy and unhelpful.”
Despite the dire consequences of living this way, why are so many of us so angry? Is it because the rewards we seek are not immediate? Is it because we face challenges to our most passionately held convictions? Or is it because we’ve inherited some long-obsolete instinct we cannot overcome? It may be impossible to know, but that doesn’t mean we can afford to ignore this sometimes paralyzing force.

Anger can be an intense emotional state, a sense that you are being antagonized by someone or something. But it can also be a chronic condition, a simmering soup of displeasure. For many, it simply becomes a habit.

Anger is generally rooted in feelings of frustration and helplessness, envy and jealousy, the belief that you are unable to attain what you want and the fear that you will lose what you have. Think about the last time you were angry. Why did you feel that way? What did you want that you weren’t getting? What were you afraid you would lose?

Anger almost always hurts the angry person more than the object of his anger. The person who made you angry may not even know he made you angry; even if he does, he has likely moved beyond whatever feelings of responsibility - or lack thereof - he had, while you continue to stew in your own juices. You cling to the anger as if it were a precious jewel. You replay the circumstances that gave rise to it over and over in your head. You seize on how you were right and he was wrong. In engaging in an endless hypothetical argument, you have given this person power over you.

In fact, those who have offended - who hold this power over you - cannot perpetuate the offense unless you let them. Don’t let them. First, admit to yourself that you are angry. Then, see if you can isolate the factors that trigger this anger, that keep its embers glowing. After you have identified them, consider your values in determining how and why they set you off. What is important to you? In the grand scheme of your life, what really matters?

Now that you have put your anger into this perspective, can you let go of it? Are you ready

to forgive the offense and more on? Or do you feel an airing of your grievances is required first? Once you have reflected on the nature of your anger and come to some enlightenment, you must take action to defuse it.

Ridding oneself of anger is an ongoing process, one you may never fully complete. However, by understanding the root cause of your anger and its triggers, you can gain control over it, quash its power to influence your feelings and behavior, maybe even find something positive breathing beneath its surface.

Ask yourself: When was the last time you were angry? How did it feel? Why did you feel that way? How did you react? What were the consequences? Was the situation resolved? If not, why not? If you can learn something about yourself from anger, you can make it your ally and thus another foothold on your climb to success.

Visit the GreatestYearEver for more questions that will open doors to answers unseen.©

The Art of Trust

The power of trust starts deep within ourselves when we access the state of vulnerability. The psychologists tell us that by becoming vulnerable we can be healed. It is in the risk-taking that we move through our fears. When we stretch our limits, we continue to grow and develop our strengths. This space can only be accessed when we feel complete safety. It is in a trusting environment that we become willing to take risks. Whenever we are in a space where we are free to express all emotions, free from judgment, criticism, and anything except wholehearted support, we let go of our defenses and open up. When we experience consistent love and support, we start to feel safe and open further, allowing our natural and authentic self to come out and play. When we let go of caring about what others might say or think and allow ourselves to make mistakes, we start to form a natural bond of comfort and ease with ourselves and our audience. It is this place where self nurturing and unending creativity pop out. It is here where we begin to communicate better, feel better and know the perfect movements, statement, feelings and actions for each moment. Many of us feel the need to be performers, always rehearsing our lines and comparing ourselves to others. As children, most of us were manipulated by parents, teachers and authority figures to do and become what they thought was best for us. Some were told, “Children should be seen and not heard,” or “Think before you speak.” Many of us were, at best, supported through “constructive criticism.” Some were diminished, embarrassed or just plain ignored. We performed in a way that supported what others thought we should be doing or saying. We accepted the idea that we had to perform rather than be ourselves. In fact, many of us took speech training where we were told to stand a certain way, speak with a “normal voice,” and look over our audience in a certain manner. The thought seldom occurred to us that we are perfect just the way we are! It is our uniqueness that shines the brightest and our differences to which others connect. When we celebrate our differences, we connect to our human oneness that says, “You’re different and that’s great!”

The power of trust lies within the power of truth. When we are truthful with ourselves, we start focusing on our brilliance instead of the past illusions of what others told us we should do or who we think we should be. It is only when we have the willingness and desire to let these illusions go that the truth of our being is revealed. It is in this search that we can let go of past wounds that stifle our abilities in the moment to realize what we have become. When we are busy thinking about what we could have become or should say, or what we should look like in front of others, our creative nature is blocked. We are then relating to others from a place of limitation, lack and fear — not trust. The power of trust is realized when we open up to our unlimited possibilities that lie just this side of truth. As you open up to this truth, the masks and defenses fade way and the uniqueness that only you possess comes forward seeking its greatness!

As you open up your heart, you will see the amazing qualities that lie locked within yourself.  I can coach you through this!

10 Steps to Create Strategic Alliances

If you’re like most entrepreneurs and business owners, doing business alone poses one of your biggest challenges.

Do you ever feel overwhelmed with all you have to do? Do you work more hours than you would like to?  Are you stressed out?  Do you sometimes wish you had a different life?  These are all signs that it is time for you to leverage what you are doing by putting together a team to support you.

Strategic alliances provide invaluable support for business owners.  When allies work as a team, the whole becomes greater than the sum of its parts. You win. Your allies win, and your company wins.  Because when people work together toward a common goal, magic happens.

Attract and choose your allies carefully. In any relationship, it’s not who shows up, but to whom we say “yes” to.  Ignoring red flags ensures disappointment and distress down the road.

Creating strategic alliances is like anything else – it’s an inside job.  When you are clear with what you want to attract into your life, you will find it quickly.  Start by asking yourself these key questions:

v What do I love to do and what would I like to delegate?

v What are the values, qualities and skill sets of your ideal partner?

v What are your greatest strengths and weaknesses?

v Where are 5 places I can find my ideal strategic alliance?

To find out more about asking the right questions check out www.asksucceed.com.

Once you’re clear on the answers to these questions, you’re ready to move on to forming your ideal strategic alliances by taking these 10 steps:

1) Look at the different areas of your business – sales, administration, accounting, operations, marketing and publicity.

2) Look in the areas where you need support. What do you enjoy doing? What would you rather hand off to others, if you felt you could trust them?

3) Prioritize areas where you need help and support on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 as “it would be great if …” to 10 as “I need a lifeline now!”

4) Determine your highest values.  What MUST you have in a partner?  Do you want someone who’s trustworthy, creative, intuitive, or system-oriented? What MUST you avoid in a partner – lateness, dishonesty, a lax sense of ethics?

5) Determine the outcome you want.  What result do you want from your alliance – more customers, higher profit margin, or more time off?

6) Create a big vision for your company. Small aspirations lack the charisma to attract desirable strategic allies.  Think about how your company can be a force for good in the world – and how much more powerful that force could be if you formed the right strategic alliances.

7) What are you willing to give to make your strategic alliance work? It’s good policy to give first, and it always comes back to you in some form.  Think about what you can do for your allies to lighten their load. Get clear on why it’s important to you to form a strategic alliance.

8) Think about where you need to go to find the type of person or company you want for a strategic ally.  Ask yourself, where do I go to find these people? Who do I know who knows people like this?

9) Make a list of those people and where you’re going to go. Then set up a  specific timeline of when and where your will meet your new alliances.

10) Take immediate actions.  Do what it takes to find the strategic alliances you want: check with friends, go to networking groups (like www.sharedvisionnetwork.com/join and ask business associations to find the type of person you’re looking for; talk to potential allies; check their references; pitch them on the idea of forming a strategic alliance. Be proactive and choose your allies. Don’t wait for someone to choose you.

Once you’ve found prospective allies, ask them the same questions you’ve asked yourself:

v What do I love to do and what would I like to delegate?

v What are the values, qualities and skill sets of your ideal partner?

v What are your greatest strengths and weaknesses?

v Where are 5 places I can find my ideal strategic alliance?

Their answers will tell you all you need to know about whether you’re meant for each other. When you find the right alliance you’re on your way to increasing success and creating a super life.

End


Ken Foster is a free-lance writer and the CEO of Shared Vision Network. To find out more go to www.sharedvisionnetwork.com/join or www.asksucceed.com or

The Success Formula of Life

Recently I asked myself, “what do I know that would help others create new levels of success?”  The answer quickly came to me!  Over the years working with thousands of business owners and coaching clients, I have found that those who are most successful apply certain principals time and time again.  In fact, there is a formula that when used, will help anyone achieve quantum breakthroughs in any area of life.  Sound like a large claim?  It is, because it works!

So if you are in a place where you are ready to step into your Greatness, then follow the formula exactly and you will win.  First is to dream big.  Create a vision where many others can participate with you.  If the dream is too small you will end up doing what most unsuccessful people do and that is you will doing it alone.   Second is to turn your dreams into goals.  Establish daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly goals.  Without goals most dreams will remain dreams.  Third is to know what is really important to you about accomplishing your goals.  Without a strong purpose for accomplishing your goals you will be stopped when the going gets tough and it will get tough.  Fourth is to decide what you are willing to give or give up to accomplish your dream.  Fifth is to design the action steps necessary to fulfill your dreams.  Don’t fret over how you will get to your dream only take daily action toward your vision.  Commitment is of paramount importance here!  When you take daily action toward your dreams your dreams will take daily action toward you.

Now these actions alone will not accomplish what you desire.  There are a few more pieces to manifesting a life.  You must find a mentor who has traveled the road before you.  Maybe a business coach or mentor!  This person will be your guide and knows what lies ahead.  Next you must have a network of like minded individuals or master mind group to share your vision and support you in accomplishing what you have set in motion.  And finally you must release it to God, for everything comes from this one source and this is the true source of your power.  Without a daily connection to the infinite struggle will be the common theme of your life.

Ken Foster is CEO of Shared Vision Network - www.sharedvisionnetwork.com and CEO of Premier Coaching.com – www.premiercoaching.com.  His latest book “Ask and You Will Succeed can be found at www.ask-succeed.com.